Wednesday, August 27, 2008

The Way I See It # 330

Maybe the reason why I can't seem to find a club that interests me is because not a lot of people here are involved in them. Out of all my friends here, very few are a part of an organization/club, and the few that are did it in high school and such. I never did anything in high school, except Drama, but in college you can't just do drama without majoring in it, at least not at VCU. I'm not into sports, and the multicultural clubs on campus I don't think I fit into. My mom says I should look into rushing a sorority, but I don't know. I guess that's something I can do. I don't even know what I want to do. I want to meet people, I want to do fun things. Last night I had a freak out because this whole becoming independent thing is harder than I thought it would be. I knew it would be hard, but it just really sucks. I went to Shafer to see if Sid was there, but when I got there he and Evan were already done eating, so I just felt so completely.....not alone.... just very unfortunate. It's sad that I depend on my boyfriend to eat with me, that I can't find someone else to eat with. Every once in a while I reflect on my troubles making friends, my dependence on my boyfriend, and not belonging to something, and I freak out. sometimes it just gets to be too hard to deal with. So last night I did.


I'll be fine. I'm adjusting. Growing pains. I need to work on this. Because it will be a long three years here to deal with feeling like this.

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