The Way I See It # 275

I'm considering putting ads on this blog for some extra revenue, but I don't think I'm actually going to do it. The Tax implications are scary enough, and I don't even think it would be worth the trouble. It was a thought after I read a financial article in some magazine at the doctor's office. However, it's glamour has somewhat waned. I finally payed off my debt for the car accident so now that's off my chest. I am now 50 cents shy of $400, probably the most financially stable I've been in a really long time. This coming week I wont be working nearly as much (just 16 hours), but I'll be happy to have some relaxation time. Sid just invited me to dinner at Brio or Gordon Biersch and a movie. It's a generous offer and to be honest I have an eyebrow raised. It's wonderful that we're going to go out, but unexpected as well. I shouldn't complain, I love going out!

I ran again today. I ran steadily at 4.5, raised it to 5.5 and then back to 4.5 for 15 minutes straight. That might not seem like a lot, but I was really proud of myself! I didn't think I could do it. I pushed myself at the end towards 6mph and gave myself a huge cramp in my chest. I guess I deserved it for amping it up like that, but I was satisfied. To be honest I've had a rough couple of days at work, and been kind of isolated, and needed to sort out my feelings. I was surprised to find myself excited to run when I got home. I don't think I've ever felt like that before. Running gives me time to think, burn a couple calories, and get my head straight. I wasn't supposed to run today because of the plan but I just thought "Fuck it."

I haven't really talked to Sid all day except for his phone call a couple minutes ago. He was hanging out with Julia, and now he's hanging out with Mike. I should be asleep now because I have work at 10, but I was really looking forward to talking with him, and he won't be online anytime soon. I'm jealous that a lot of people get to hang out with him during the day like I can't. It makes me wish I had people I could turn to on my days off when Sid is working.


Sid made a video on Youtube called "Letters"
One of them is about me, I'm certain.
If there is more than one, I can't be sure.
I suppose I'll keep my thoughts to myself from now on.




I don't know how to end this.

The Way I See It # 272

I ran this morning and to be totally honest it wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it was going to be. I'm running this program in order to get myself from sitting around all day to running 30 minutes straight... and more. So I'm excited. granted it is the first day, but the entire routine only takes 20 minutes, so It shouldn't be hard to do this even when I work. Meaning, I have no excuse not to do it. I felt like I could run longer, but I'm just going to follow the plan, because I know that if I push myself too hard, I'll just give up sooner rather than never.

So I'm waiting for the shower now, and I've got some time to Kill. Sid and I saw Get Smart last night and I thought it was cute/amusing. I'm not a big fan of Anne Hathaway, but I liked Steve Carrel enough to supplement.

I have no plans for today, Sid is currently at a dentist appointment, and I'm in a steady state of waiting. My room is clean, for once, I took the time to make my mom happy and clean it. I can tell that she is at peace when we do what she says, so I've adjusted my reasoning accordingly. Sure I don't want to clean it, but for right now making my Mom happy is just about the most important thing.

Dad talked to me about furniture for the apartment next year and I got the very clear impression that he won't be paying for any of it, or at least that's what he thinks as of right now. I can't afford any furniture at the moment, however, so i don't know how that's going to fly.


whatever. Time to shower!

The Way I See It # 271

I'm off for the next three days and I feel amazing about it. Work was hard tonight, but knowing that I get paid on Friday, and I don't work until then made it tolerable. The store was a fucking mess, however, when we closed to cleaning up until 11 sucked. Oh well. As for getting the fourth of July off, you'd think I had done the company a great injustice. Bullshit since I've worked my ass off trying to please everyone and taking on more hours. I should at least get my first request off day. But I have it off, and Ehsan is a savior, and that's that.

My feet are in terrible shape. I've been wearing the wrong kinds of shoes (flat and high) and I'm feeling the repercussions. Did Carrie Bradshaw ever have this problem? Speaking of Carrie Bradshaw, Sidney got me the Sex And The City movie poster for me from work! Now I have something to put up in my apartment next year! I thought he was going to get me the Indiana Jones poster, but this is so much better. Thanks Sidney :).

So tomorrow my plan is to sleep in, call Abby, and get lunch or something since we never have our days off on the same day. That should be fun. There are a lot of people I want to hang out with including Julian, Michele, Abby, Ebbie, the guys from school like Evan, Dombrowski, and Geoffrion, and Coppola. I kind of miss everyone. lately my life has been very scheduled. I'm working all the time, and when I'm not working I'm with Sidney (Not that I don't love that), but I need to keep in touch with other people otherwise I'll go into another year with a deminished supply of friends.

I'm going on a diet. I thought back on the time that I was at my desirable weight and that's when I ate nothing. No breakfast, half a sandwich for lunch with water, and then maybe half my dinner. That was so long ago. So I'ma take a stab at getting back to where I was. And the running thing I still want to do. Sid's taking up running again so that's cool.


I should go to sleep, it's cold and late.

The Way I See It # 270

I need to be proactive. Fuck this whole "Not doing anything" thing. I don't do anything except work and stay at home. I need to start an activity.

I'm going to start running.

Fuck what I've said in the past. I need to do this. I want to know for sure if I can have the will power to do something like running habitually.

I need to lose a few (a couple..... a lot) and this is the logical way to do it. I barely eat anything now, it's not like I could diet.


So I'm going to start running, on my terms, and I have to do this. I need to.